No More Chances

I thought I'd start out my next post in the right direction, preferably talking about my future aspirations of being a pediatrician, my college goals, my field of interest, and the newest medical technology. Instead, I've decided to talk, yet again, about my father simply because today I receieved four more calls, 2 voicemails, and 11 texts. Let me explain..

So last night my dad called me about twice and left me a voicemail asking me to please call him back and that he loved me, of course I had no intentions of responding. He called once more last night and once again this morning. I didn't answer. Then while I was at work he texted me asking if I was working, I decided (for the pure hell of it) to respond and our text conversation went on like this:

Me: yes, why?
Him: Call me after work?
Me: Maybe
Him: Please don't tell me you still don't wanna see me
Me: It's not like much has changed since the last time I talked to you
Him: Fine do what you want, I'm not begging my own daughter..
Me: And I'm not asking much from my father..
Him: K
(No response, 2 hour break)
Him: I'm going to treatment on the 19th in IC for 3 weeks, hope to see you before then
Me: You won't

Now, you may think it was a bit harsh but I'm doing it in both of our best interests. If I let him back into my life yet again, before he gets through treatment, before he's made it past a couple months, what good is it gonna do when he drinks again? For me, I'll be heartbroken yet again, and he, well, he just won't have anything more to do then mope around and feel sorry for himself. Pathetic. I've decided not to talk to him until after treatment. I can't help but feel like he's really changed this time..just like I always do. But then again, it's like my second nature to know he'll mess it up. I guess this time it's truely in God's hands and I pray for his sake, that he means it this time. I don't know how many more lives he'll get. He's had over nine and I don't think God gives out much more then that. I'm praying for him.